Released: 2012
Director: Steve Latshaw
Not Rated
Run Time: 84 Minutes
Genre: Horror/Comedy
Cast:
James Best: Thorne Sherman
John Schneider: Johnny Reno
Bruce Davison: Jerry Farrell
Jennifer Lyons: Mickey
Sean Flynn: Derek
Jason-Shane Scott: Sam
You want to know something? I love movies from the 50s, especially the science fiction, horror, and creature features. There is something inherently charming about those old movies that makes me want to watch them over and over. Movies like The Day The Earth Stood Still, Invasion of the Body Snatchers, Them!, Tarantula, and It Came From Beneath The Sea are just some of my absolute favorites. Even the bad ones like The Giant Claw, The Manster, and The Wasp Woman were very entertaining in a “so-bad-it’s-good” kind of way. There was another movie that was released in 1959 called The Killer Shrews. It was a movie that many considered to be a pretty bad movie, even by 1950s standards. So, when I heard that a sequel to The Killer Shrews was made, my brain exploded. The Killer Shrews, a film well over 50 years old, gets a sequel made in 2012? I imagine you’re probably saying to yourself, “Well, that can’t possibly work.” Well……it didn’t, and I think it was on purpose.
Return of the Killer Shrews stars James Best, returning to his role of Thorne Sherman, as he and his first mate are escorting a film crew to an island somewhere in the middle of nowhere to film a reality show of sorts. After getting to the island, Thorne is beginning to have second thoughts, until he’s reminded that he’s getting paid for this. After reaching shore, they are taken to the camp where some of the film-makers have already set up shop along with the show’s star, Johnny Reno. Before long, people start going missing, and the entire film crew is set upon by these big and ugly rat-like creatures. That’s pretty much the plot in a nutshell. Not much there is it. There really wasn’t much to the original film, either, apparently. The only real purpose the “story” serves is to go from one group of people getting eaten to another. That’s it. From what I understand, the original film was definitely a product of its time. What we’ve got here is a film that should have been made and released back in 1960. I’m not entirely sure how to articulate what it is that I just saw. There are varying degrees of cheese. Return of the Killer Shrews is what I would call Swiss Cheese, because it’s full of…you know, holes. Honestly, there is no way you could accidentally make a movie this bad. It had to have been done on purpose. To be fair, you’re taking a movie from 1959 that was bad to begin with and you’re trying to make a sequel. How could you possibly make a good movie out of that? You can’t.
Since this IS a creature feature, let’s discuss the creature designs and the effects. I understand that this was an extremely low-budget movie, but holy crap. The effects are AWFUL. I’ve seen some pretty low-grade CGI in movies before, but this takes it to a whole new level. I’m talking bottom-of-the-barrel CGI. I’ve seen animals from a 1999 video game cut-scene look better than these things. Okay, so they’re deliberately making these creatures obviously low-budget, and you know what? I can go with that. It’s kind of hilarious to see these things attack people. There are some puppets and some practical effects in this film, and I definitely appreciate that, but the one thing I absolutely HATE in a creature feature or horror movie is CGI blood. I may be a stickler for that small detail, but it does add SOME authenticity to what’s going on. Use a few ketchup packets if you need to. There are also a couple of sequences where you see a close up of the beasts’ teeth, and the exact same little bit happens every time there’s an attack. Once again, I feel that the effects were not just a result of a lack of money, but rather a design choice.
I would say that we should talk about performances next, but aside from two major players, there’s nothing here really worth discussing, in my opinion. James Best plays Thorne Sherman, the main character from The Killer Shrews, and Best is pretty entertaining I have to say. He really does put a lot of effort into his role, and actually the character a reasonable amount of substance, and some fairly emotional weight. That surprised me, actually. Bruce Davison plays Jerry Farrell, also a character from the original film. I absolutely have to give Bruce credit here. He’s clearly having a really good time in this movie. I’ve always enjoyed Bruce Davison as an actor. He’s quite versatile, and to see him in a movie like this goes to show that he doesn’t always take himself seriously, and that makes for a pretty decent performance. One of the best parts of the film, is when he’s acting opposite James Best, and that leads to some of the best parts of the film. The way those two play off each other is really good. The other guy that I should mention is John Schneider, who is essentially playing a send-up of himself. Again, it’s really odd to someone like him in a movie like this, but it’s not the first time he’s done a low-budget sci-fi flick, so he’s no stranger to these kinds of movies. Here, he’s playing a self-absorbed actor who thinks he’s all that. Schneider doesn’t strike me as the kind of guy that’s actually like that, so it’s pretty goofy to see him play an egotistical actor. Everybody else? Shrew-fodder. There’s nobody else that’s particularly likable, so I don’t feel bad when they get eaten.
You know, it’s funny. After watching this movie, I was expecting myself to completely shred this movie to pieces. It probably deserves it. But the more I think about it, and the more I type, the more drawn I am to the whole damn thing. I love me a good bad movie, but I was surprised to find myself not hating on this movie as much as I was expecting. The more I typed, the more I came to realize that this movie WAS deliberately made to be bad. From what I saw, the film was meant to be not just an homage to the original Killer Shrews, but also a kind of spoof-type sequel. It’s really a celebration of the kind of bad movie that The Killer Shrews was. If you really enjoy cheesy, z-grade bad movies, this is definitely one to watch. I mean, when one of the characters blurts out, “I’m the director. Obey me!,” you kind of start figuring out what kind of movie you’re getting yourself into.
My Final Recommendation: “I’m the director! Obey me!” 6.5/10