Movie Trailer-The Room. THE ROOM!!!
Director: Tommy Wiseau(If you can call him a director)
Run Time: 99 minutes that I will never, EVER get back.
Rated R for Retarded
Released: 2003…..unfortunately
Cast:
Tommy Wiseau: Johnny
Juliette Danielle: Lisa
Greg Sestero: Mark
Philip Haldiman: Denny
Bad movies are really a dime a dozen these days. Don’t believe me? All you have to do is turn on the TV to the Sy-Fy channel, Lifetime or any other channel that isn’t HBO. I honestly believe that most filmmakers try not to make deliberately bad movies. Even if they’re from The Asylum, they try to do the best they can based on the budget they have been given. I’ve seen my fair share of bad movies over the years. From Remo Williams to Highlander: The Source, I’ve been witness to some pretty crappy film-making. Granted, it’s my choice to watch these suckers. Sometimes I regret it, and sometimes I don’t. I certainly don’t regret watching the Sharknado movies. Those are actually a lot of fun. Movies like that are self-conscious and don’t take themselves seriously at all. Then you have movies that are crap that take themselves WAY too seriously. These are ones that you laugh at, and the actors and crew don’t seem to be in on the joke. Even Uwe Boll’s films have some form of entertainment to them. At least he puts a little effort into his flicks. Tommy Wiseau, on the other hand, I don’t think has the first clue how to make a movie.
Unceremoniously dumped on audiences back in 2003, this abomination of a movie follows Tommy…I’m sorry, JOHNNY through every day life doting on his cheating, backstabbing girlfriend, Juliette..oops, Lisa, while trying to get a promotion at his job. Unbeknownst to him(and how he doesn’t figure this out early on, I will never know), Lisa is sleeping with his best friend, Greg, er, Mark, another horrendously acted “character.” THAT is the gist of the “plot.” The Room gained a great deal of notoriety when it was released. Most rational people had declared it the worst movie ever made. Truthfully, I would have to agree. Everything about this movie is just plain awful. Let’s talk about the “performances.” Wow. Nobody is trying, whatsoever. I swear, these jokers are reading off a teleprompter or cue cards. Tommy himself looks like he’s asleep throughout the whole thing, while uttering lines of such Writer’s Guild quality like, “You are tearing me apart, Lisa!” His character greets everybody with “Oh, hi so-and-so.” At one point, these people are at each other’s throats, and the next second they’re all buddy-buddy again. Actually, you know what? You have to see this for yourself, and I’m going to spare you the need to actually rent this garbage. Watch it. Watch it, I say!
Not much is really known about Tommy Wiseau. He’s very secretive about his personal life. From what I’ve read, he’s independently wealthy and doesn’t need to make movies to live. The Room was apparently made on a 6 million dollar budget. Nobody knows how he financed it. I would assume he did it himself. You could have fooled me. It looks like something you could make in your back yard for 5 bucks. The sets, the costumes…EVERYTHING is clearly cheap. The sex scenes are completely random and hilarious to watch. All the tension in the film is basically centered around who goes going to say the next terrible line. The music is terrible, but then I would assume you already know that. You know what’s funny? The Room has become a cult classic of sorts. There have been midnight showings where the audience members dress up as their favorite characters and basically clown around. Apparently, it’s a movie that’s a lot more fun when you’re around other people. It certainly deserves a Riff Trax, that’s for sure. Oh, hi Riff Trax! I think that Riff Trax sums it better than I ever could.
There is only one other movie that’s reached this level of notoriety and that’s Troll 2. I haven’t seen it yet, but now I have to. As I said before, bad movies are a dime-a-dozen, but it takes real talent to make something as dreadful as The Room. Tommy Wiseau billed this movie as a serious drama, but it just ended up being unintentionally hilarious. Sorry, Tommy. Go back to wherever it is you came from and actually learn how to make semi-competent film. The Room has set the bar SO low for movies, that it touches the ground. Any future bad movies that I watch will be measured against The Room. I’m not even sure how to score this one. Let’s give it a bash: For the movie itself: 1/10. For it’s unintentional hilarity: 10/10. Overall…….still a 1/10, and I’m being generous. If, for some unfathomable reason you are curious about this movie, just watch the links I posted. They’re far more entertaining. Tommy Wiseau’s character ended up shooting himself in the head at the end of the movie, presumably from the terrible script and acting. So, yeah. This one is definitely a bad movie.
“Stop ganging up on me!!!”